My name is Tracy-Lee Neville.  I was born and raised in England in the U.K. in the 1970s and grew up in the City of Bristol.  At age 18, I moved to London to attend Middlesex University for its European Business Management degree course, thinking that this degree was a sensible choice, but knowing that my heart disagreed.  After two years at the Business School in London and two years at a Business School in Marseille, France, I graduated with a B.A. degree in European Management, knowing that I had no intention of pursuing a career in any of the subjects that I had studied, because I was not excited about any of them.  But I didn’t know what I wanted to do, work-wise, instead.  I spent many years in jobs that were soul-destroying for me and feeling very disheartened because I wasn’t sure which career would suit my nature and my skills, or quite where my passions lay.  I was, it could be described, rather lost.  I did not really know who I was.

In the area of personal, romantic relationships, I have also suffered emotionally, to quite a major extent, as a result of some of the intimate partner type relationships that I have had.  I’ve experienced the betrayal of trust that is infidelity.  I’ve been on the receiving end of damaging behaviors such as refusal to communicate, (otherwise known as stonewalling, ghosting or the silent treatment).  I am also a Survivor of Domestic Violence, (otherwise known as Domestic Abuse or Intimate Partner Violence), having endured mistreatment such as attempts to erode my self-worth via demeaning and critical and blatantly insulting comments, attempts to isolate me from others, withdrawal of affection, intimidating threats, attempts to gaslight, unpredictable outbursts of apparently unprovoked rage, and escalation to physical assault.

Domestic Abuse and Infidelity and Stonewalling, (the latter two being forms of abuse too, in fact), are far too common.  “1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men will experience severe physical violence by an intimate partner in their lifetime” (Source: CDC, 2017).  Spouses cheating on their spouses or significant others is rife.  As is the existence of people who harm others by avoiding communicating in sincere, honest, open, transparent ways.

As a result of the various forms of mistreatment I experienced from men, (including originally from my well-meaning but acutely harmful Dad),  I experienced the following set of emotions.  Extremely low self-esteem, anxiety, fear, severe depression, suicidal ideation.

The emotional pain and distress that I have felt due to various traumas led me to seek ways to heal.  And I realized along the way that I had a strong desire to help others, that I wanted to be able to assist other people on their journeys of healing.  The concept of “The Wounded Healer” plays an integral part in my work with clients, since often it allows me to better understand the struggles that my clients name.

My level of self-worth was almost crushed and at times it felt like depression would overtake me to a point of no return, but I have survived and overcome all the ‘fiery darts’ sent to attempt to destroy me.  I now know with clarity what love is and what it is not.  And I now see the truth of who I am and I value myself as I ought to, i.e. accurately.  I recognize my unique qualities, truly like who I am, am truly proud of who I am, and now the challenge is to stay strong in the face of anyone and anything that crosses my path and tries to harm me in any way.

I felt a strong pull towards the idea of being in a more solid position to offer emotional and psychological support to others as they pass through difficult or/and painful times in their lives and as they undertake their own personal growth quests.  So, in January 2004 I began training to become a Psychotherapist at the Centre for Counselling and Psychotherapy Education, in London.  I later graduated with a Master’s degree in Transpersonal Counselling and Psychotherapy from the University of Northampton, England.  Since moving to the U.S. in 2012, I have become licensed to practice psychotherapy in the states of New York, Florida and California, where my official professional titles are Licensed Mental Health Counselor, LMHC, and Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, LPCC.  Elsewhere in the U.S. my professional title is Life Coach.

I have been working in the Psychotherapy field since October 2004.  In central London, I worked with clients at a doctors’ office in the Harley Street neighborhood, at a drop-in counseling center on Piccadilly and at a counseling center on Portobello Road in Notting Hill.  In Brooklyn, New York, I worked with patients in the Inpatient Psychiatric Unit of SUNY Downstate Hospital.  In Manhattan, New York, I worked as a Psychotherapist in a group practice on the Upper West Side.  I now have a private practice here in the USA, physically based in Brooklyn, New York, but licensed in three states, treating clients residing in NY, CA and FL, via sessions conducted remotely.