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Valentine’s Day 2018 is almost here.  You’ve seen the huge section of shelves, dedicated to beautiful, sentimental, soppy, sweet Valentine’s Day cards, next to the smaller section of St. Patrick’s Day cards.  You’ve seen those Valentine’s Day cards there, ever since the Christmas cards were removed!

You wish with all of your heart that you had a “special” person in your life, to buy one of those cards for.  You’d love to be looking through that section, choosing the “perfect” card to express how you feel about your relationship with your “Valentine”.  First, picking out cards that stand out to you, and then reading the words inside.  Which card would have the most meaning for you and your Valentine?  But you don’t have a Valentine.

I’m not going to say to you: “Don’t worry!  You’ll have another romantic partner!”  Because even so, Valentine’s Day this year, you do not have him/her.  And it can be tough, emotionally painful, “in your face”.  I don’t want you to be consumed by sadness, but certainly give yourself “permission” to grieve for what you have lost, or for what you have not yet found.  Somebody is missing in your life, and you wanted to be one of the people searching happily through the February 14th cards, this year.

According to Richie Bernado, (2017), “More than 45 percent of the U.S. adult population is unmarried, according to the latest U.S. Census Bureau estimates”, (retrieved from https://wallethub.com/edu/best-worst-cities-for-singles/9015/), and this percentage varies from state to state and from city to city.  Then, out of the 45 percent, or so, of unmarried adults in New York City, you then have a percentage of those adults who are not dating or in a relationship.  All this to remind you, if you ever feel that you are “alone” in the “No Valentine” category, that you are most definitely not alone.  Also remember that out of the 55 percent, or thereabouts, of adults who are married, not all of those marriages are beautiful, healthy, loving marriages.  And the same applies to relationships between unmarried couples.

I’ll end this piece with the following train of thought.  The Valentine’s Day tradition may be a crude reminder to you that you do not have a “sweetheart” to buy a card for this February, but it’s just a day.  What I want for you is for you to be in a relationship in which Every day you experience true love and care and genuine sweet-heartedness from the other.  Better to be single than to be in a sub-standard, or worse still, an unhealthy, relationship!